Red



After trading in his professional past as a black-ops CIA operative for a new identity, Frank Moses (Bruce Willis) is basking in normality. But he’s forced to return to old habits when an assassin puts a target on his back and goes after the woman (Mary-Louise Parker) he loves. Helen Mirren and John Malkovich co-star as former members of Frank’s team who reluctantly reassemble to save his life in this Golden Globe-nominated action-comedy.

This all star cast features Bruce Willis, Mary-Louise Parker, Morgan Freeman, Helen Mirren, John Malkovich, Julian McMahon, Ernest Borgnine, Richard Dreyfuss, Brian Cox, Karl Urban and James Remar.

I am giving this one 3.9 stars. It really is just 3.4 stars but I have a soft spot for Ernest Borgnine who had to be 93 while filming this. He was not a breakout character or anything but still to see someone his age still walking and remembering his lines was a pleasure. I hope I am as good if I reach 93. Mr. Borgnine is from Hamden, CT which is the next town over from where I grew up. He is a local and I am proud to say that.

You can shoot holes at this movie and say things like “that can’t happen” or “that’s not realistic.” We see movies to be entertained and this movie with all the turmoil in the world was a great escape. This movie is all about respect, friendship and just doing the right thing. It worked on so many different levels for me.

Click here for the Netflix link in case you would like to add it to your queue.

All the best,

Alan
Alan Zibluk
The Internet Guy
Cell: (203) 500-3834
E-mail: al@alzibluk.com

Grass



Narrated by actor and pot activist Woody Harrelson, this slick and snappy documentary chronicles the history of marijuana use and prohibition from the early 1900s through modern day. Biased toward legalization in tone, the clever if subjective film reveals the absurdity of government anti-grass tactics. Comic Tommy Chong also lends his voice to this informative and amusing illustration of how one substance among many has created such a clamor.

I wasn’t too familiar with the history of marijuana so this was an interesting movie for me. These days I get really upset on the subject of wasteful spending. What is the big deal? I admit I was scared to ever try it growing up as I was afraid I would go paranoid and hurt people. As Pinto said to Professor Jennings in Animal House “I won’t go schizo, will I?” Jennings response “It’s a distinct possibility.”

I am going to give this one 3 stars. The one thing I would like to say as a responsible movie critic is too much of any one thing is never good. I am talking about things like too much chocolate, caffeine, alcohol, junk food, etc. I am a firm believer in moderation.

Click here for the Netflix link in case you would like to add it to your queue.

All the best,

Alan
Alan Zibluk
The Internet Guy
Cell: (203) 500-3834
E-mail: al@alzibluk.com

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World



When dreamy delivery girl Ramona (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) starts popping up in his life, slacker musician Scott Pilgrim (Michael Cera) takes notice. But to win the love of this rollerblading goddess, Scott must vanquish all seven of her evil exes in martial arts battles. Based on Bryan Lee O’Malley’s graphic novels, director Edgar Wright’s action-packed romcom also stars Anna Kendrick, Brandon Routh and Chris Evans.

I would say this movie is a mix of John Hughes “The Breakfast Club” meets “The Matrix.” It is Scott Pilgrim’s fantasy world as he deals with his real life insecurities by imagining Mortal Kombat/Guitar Hero video game competitions with his girlfriend’s exes. This is just such a wild idea and I think it plays out well. You can’t help yourself but to like Michael Cera as he was Paulie Bleeker in Juno.

I have to admit I thought about past relationships while watching this. To them I didn’t have a past and any mention of it would lead them to locking themselves in the bathroom. Further I too didn’t like hearing about past boyfriends or husbands so I understand the insecurity. Should people in serious relationships talk about past serious relationships to each other? It is an important question to ask.

I am giving this thought provoking movie 3.45 stars. I liked it.

Click here for the Netflix link in case you would like to add it to your queue.

All the best,

Alan
Alan Zibluk
The Internet Guy
Cell: (203) 500-3834
E-mail: al@alzibluk.com

The Bank Job



Based on actual events in 1971, this thriller tells the story of a car dealer (Jason Statham) who becomes involved in a London bank heist, only to find that the contents of the bank vault will draw him deeply and irrevocably into the city’s criminal underbelly. Murder and scandal abound in this tale of corruption populated with a surprising mix of offenders, from low-level thugs to government officials — all the way up to the royal family.

I believe after seeing this Jason Statham could be this era’s Steve McQueen. He doesn’t have to say anything and yet he is cool. I have talked to my critic friends about this and I am not the only one who feels this way. This is not your usual action Transporter type of movie. It is based on actual events. You will not see the actor do any fancy kicks or punches but you do get to see him slap a really bad guy around. It was satisfying to watch.

I found this to be a good suspenseful crime drama movie. You do see different characters and storylines but in the end you do see them all connected. I would like to see Jason Statham do more movies like this. I believe the action ones are the ones that pay the bills.

I am giving this one 3.4 stars. It is not the best bank heist movie I have ever seen but good enough to recommend.

Click here for the Netflix link in case you would like to add it to your queue.

All the best,

Alan
Alan Zibluk
The Internet Guy
Cell: (203) 500-3834
E-mail: al@alzibluk.com

Blake Edwards S.O.B.



In director Blake Edwards’s satire of the Hollywood film industry, squeaky-clean superstar Sally Miles (Julie Andrews) is the key to a fading director’s (Richard Mulligan) sudden plan to flip his flop into a smash: He wants Sally to appear topless in a reshot version of his film. This wickedly funny, ingeniously subversive comedy also stars Larry Hagman, William Holden, Robert Preston, Robert Vaughn, Loretta Swit and Rosanna Arquette.

This movie is famous for showing Julie Andrews topless. I had to admit it was weird for me to see. It is after all Mary Poppins.

This was actor William Holden’s last movie. It is ironic how his character talks about consuming way too much alcohol in his life. The actor died hitting his head after a serious binge drinking shortly after. I hope you are reading this Charlie Sheen.

This satire is based loosely on events in Blake Edward’s life and also Hollywood. John Barrymore’s (Drew Barrymore’s grandfather) corpse was actually borrowed. I am reminded of the phrase “life is stranger than fiction.” There is sex and drug use in this movie. This movie is definitely not for everyone.

I think the underlying message here is how little Hollywood cares for one another. You are only as good as your last film. If you are a success everyone wants to be your friend but the minute you fail no one wants any part of you. It is a sad comment. I think for this reason alone I am rating this one 2.8 stars. It could be my mood. People more familiar with the Hollywood scene have rated this higher.

Click here for the Netflix link in case you would like to add it to your queue.

All the best,

Alan
Alan Zibluk
The Internet Guy
Cell: (203) 500-3834
E-mail: al@alzibluk.com

The A-Team



This updated feature-film take on the hit 1980s television show follows a group of Iraq War veterans on the run from U.S. military forces while they try to clear their names after being framed for a crime they didn’t commit. Along the way, Col. Hannibal Smith, Capt. H.M. “Howling Mad” Murdock , Sgt. Bosco “B.A.” Baracus and Lt. Templeton “Faceman” Peck help out various people they encounter. Joe Carnahan directs this high-octane actioner.

I will say this movie is a worthy remake (or reboot) of its 1980’s TV series predecessor. Both had preposterous situations but also just a lot of fun. I was reminded of the Transformer movies during this as there were lots of explosions, enemy fire, and falling debris. We have characters constantly escaping certain death and never once did I fear for any of our heroes.

There are no gray characters. We just have good guys taking on the bad guys. The friendship in the TV series seemed more genuine.

My only problem is the Jessica Biel character. Although she cannot act and her only purpose is to be eye candy, it doesn’t work here. This formula works really well with Megan Fox in the Transformer movies but not here. Here’s why, a girl just doesn’t belong with The A-Team. It didn’t work for Melinda Culea and Marla Heasley in the TV series, it doesn’t work for Jessica Biel.

I want to say to the women readers I feel the same way about Sex in the City. A guy would not belong at the same table with Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda. Yes I did watch the TV series, no to your second question and it would have been Cynthia Nixon.

Watching this movie will not make you any smarter but it was fun. It was a good escape. I am giving this one 3 stars and putting it in the category of “guilty pleasures” in my movie folder. Other movies in this category are Road House, Lethal Weapon and Independence Day.

Click here for the Netflix link in case you would like to add it to your queue.

All the best,

Alan
Alan Zibluk
The Internet Guy
Cell: (203) 500-3834
E-mail: al@alzibluk.com

Get Him to the Greek



Ambitious young record company intern Aaron Green (Jonah Hill) will let nothing get in the way of his planned rise to the top in the music business — not even the unruly rock star (Russell Brand) he must escort to Los Angeles for the start of his anniversary concert. Doing whatever it takes to get the rocker from Point A to Point B, Aaron encounters all manners of mishaps in this comedy directed by Nicholas Stoller and produced by Judd Apatow.

I did not realize that this was a sequel of sorts to Forgetting Sarah Marshall as Russell Brand reprises his Aldous Snow character. Kristen Bell does have a cameo as Sarah Marshall. Jonah Hill was also in that movie but plays a different character here. I don’t know what it is but Russell Brand and Jonah Hill have great onscreen chemistry. They could be a great comedy team and hope to see them in more movies together.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall is the better movie. It was funnier and there were some scenes I found quite touching. I gave that movie 4 stars and do recommend it. Click here for the Netflix link for Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

I did like this movie but would have liked it better if it wasn’t Aldous Snow again. He was great in the first movie as someone so self absorbed you couldn’t help but laugh. In this second one he is more human and caring which didn’t work for me. I like the comedy aspects of this movie, wasn’t too crazy about the drama.

I am giving this one 3 stars. If you are going to see this, see Forgetting Sarah Marshall first. The best part of both films is seeing Russell Brand and Jonah Hill together.

Click here for the Netflix link in case you would like to add it to your queue.

All the best,

Alan
Alan Zibluk
The Internet Guy
Cell: (203) 500-3834
E-mail: al@alzibluk.com

Linda Lovelace for President


Personal politics aside, legendary adult film star Linda Lovelace (as herself) is a candidate the entire country can support for the newly formed Upright Party in this hybrid of sex romp satire and documentary farce. Tracking a fictional cross-country campaign that will leave you in stitches, this commentary on apathetic American voters features fantastic celebrity cameos, including Micky Dolenz, Scatman Crothers and more.

I knew going in that this movie was going to be bad and cheesy. I thought the absurdity of it would make me laugh. I was wrong. This movie had lots of Polish, Asian, Italian, Black and Gay jokes but none of them were funny. There was also lots of “coming” and “going down” references but none of them worked. Spare yourself the 95 minutes and avoid this one.

I almost wasn’t going to write a review of this one out of embarrassment but when I logged into my Netflix Account I saw the only 6 reviews were people who liked it. I have to warn people not to waste their time.

I am not posting a trailer for this one as well as including a Netflix link to it. It was that bad. I am given this one zero stars (Can I use a negative number?).

The only thing I liked about this was seeing an old rotary phone, a Soylent Green reference and being reminded of a George Harrison video with the over the top zany characters. Since I like videos, I am sharing that George Harrison video below.



All the best,

Alan
Alan Zibluk
The Internet Guy
E-mail: al@alzibluk.com

Michael Clayton



Screenwriter Tony Gilroy delivers a finely tuned directorial debut with this dramatic thriller about burned-out corporate lawyer Michael Clayton (George Clooney), a man who’s built his career on cleaning up other people’s messes. When a guilt-ridden colleague (Tom Wilkinson) threatens the settlement of a multimillion-dollar case, Clayton faces his biggest challenge yet. Tilda Swinton nabbed an Oscar for her turn as a conflicted general counsel.

I thought watching most of this I was going to write a nasty review. There are way too many comparisons with other movies like Network, The Firm that I thought I wasn’t going to like it but the end really played out well. I felt something and I liked how Michael Clayton relied on his family when the chips were really down. This alone has gotten me in an emotional state. To quote Linda Richman from an SNL sketch, “I’m feeling verklempt, talk amongst yourselves.”

I am going to say skip the first 85 minutes of this. It is a two hour movie and the last 35 minutes were the only ones worth watching. I was thoroughly entertained at the end. I am giving this one 3.2 stars.

Click here for the Netflix link in case you would like to add it to your queue.

All the best,

Alan
Alan Zibluk
The Internet Guy
E-mail: al@alzibluk.com

The Informers (2008)



Set in the decadent 1980s in Los Angeles, a Hollywood executive (Billy Bob Thornton) plays his ex-wife (Kim Basinger) and his mistress (Winona Ryder) while his son, Graham (Jon Foster), finds himself among a group of brats, including Christie (Amber Heard), who are all caught up in the thick of drugs and sex. Mickey Rourke and Brad Renfro also star in director Gregor Jordan’s intricately plotted film based on Bret Easton Ellis’s book.

I have a fondness for the 80s and Kim Basinger so I had to see this movie despite the fact I could not find anyone saying anything positive about it. Even Netflix questioned my decision to get this one. There are lots of gratuitous nudity and drug use in this and definitely not for a prudish person. I am giving it one star. This is not a good movie however I did enjoy not like it and laughing at the dialogue.

Click here for the Netflix link in case you would like to add it to your queue.

All the best,

Alan
Alan Zibluk
The Internet Guy
E-mail: al@alzibluk.com